The Crossroads

Well it is the middle of the month. I have played about 50k hands. I have never actually even played this many hands in an entire month before. I thought I was running bad before. I am definetely running bad now. The last 5k hands have just been brutal. And this is a completely normal occurence in poker.

My ability to cope with this tiny downswing is troubling to me. That big losing day yesterday, affected me mentally. One day got to me! I could feel it all day today. And I took it to the tables tonight. I felt, for the first time in a long I was on tilt.

So I quit a bit earlier than normal tonight, knowing that I was not in my best shape mentally, to play. This is good. But the tilt just can't happen. You can be a marginal winner and tilt. But in order to be a big winner, you can't tilt. I have to reevaluate what I want out of this game. Cuz if I can't handle 5k hands worth of adversity, there is something seriously wrong here.

I am going to post my midmonth graph in order to remind myself, why I play this game. I simply need to play more. 4k hands per day should be a minimum. Thats only 2 seperate 3 hour sessions.

Midmonth totals

$1362 made on the tables, almost exclusively at NL50, over 76 total hours @ 3.25 ptbb/100. Along with $2261 in MGR, which at 27% rakeback, works out to $610. All for a grand total of...

+$1972 USD

@ $26 USD per/hr

Hands Played: 1981

Rakeback (April) +$31

Results: +$16

Bankroll: $5616

Amount Needed: $4384

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