I see flops in my dreams :o

Played 96k hands this month so far and I took the first five days off and recently had another 4 day stretch off. My previous highest total for an entire month was just 75k. So I've been doing several 6, 8, 10k hand days where I play 6-10 hours. If only I could have figured out how to do this 3 years ago, I'd be a multimillionaire right now =/

I give a lot of the credit to taking better care of myself. Eating completely healthy, fruit shakes, rice, chicken, veggies, type stuff, and jogging every other day. I wasn't terrible before, but being in top physical and mental shape...its amazing what it does for you.

Anyways, this past month has all been at super low limits on Stars. I'm gonna start playing on Full Tilt again tomorrow in some real games with rakeback. The bulk of my bankroll sits on that site. This month I think I have been purposely punishing myself to play the idiot stakes on Stars. And its worked. It helped me realize the value of a dollar again.

It helped me realize that I have spent the last 3 years of my life intensely studying this game and I don't have near enough to show for it. Why? Because I lacked the discipline. The number one trait in a poker player is discipline. When you are the boss, and can make enough to get by in a few days or a week, it becomes very easy to slack off. Nobody is going to fire you if you don't show up. Since professional poker players have lots of reserve funds in the bank, slacking off for a week or two or a month isn't going to matter much either.

The most successful poker players have that fire within that gets them in there every single day. Maybe it just requires more work in my case, but I can do it. In the very least, I can play some lower limits on pure auto pilot and make something, if I am not feeling it on that particular day.

Probably the most important and only useful thing I have ever gotten out of a poker forum (seriously, they are the bathroom walls of the internet) was this. Loosely quoted from a poker player I greatly respect

"I want to be the player who makes the most money in my game. I could give a fuck about being the one with the best winrate."

No truer words were ever spoken. While people on heaters who barely play the game, endlessly brag about their winrates, and put down others, I could care less about that. The players I respect are the ones who top the money list at the end of the month or year. The ones who are in there every day. While I do still enjoy many of the intellectual aspects of this game, poker is really just about the money. I simply want to be the one who gets the most of it.

Really need to focus on myself for once. I realize I can't blow everything and everyone off. But I need to continue to be %100 dedicated to putting in the hours every single day. The sky truly is the limit.